HOW WE COMPLETED THE THREE YEARS OF OUR 'BARC' (Bachelors in Art of Random Conversations) IN MANIPAL!

raj- if i was working in CNN-IBN and was smoking pot as well, what would my name be?
venky- (blank)
raj- Rajweed Sardesai!
venky-dude! are you this wasted!

Bala- If Raj Shekhar Jha smokes pot then his surname should be?
raj- dunno.. what?
Bala- Raj Shekhar 'Gaanjha'!
Raj- (blank)

raj- abey, what should be the 'apt' name for cocks and mocks?
Nor10- cocks and Vic!
raj- No, cocks and Dicks!

raj- dude how is kareena kapoor not in danger?
venky- dunno.. how?
raj- coz she in 'saif' hands!
venky- (blank)

raj- dude what should a doctors wife do if she does not wana have sex with him?
min2- dunno..what?
Raj- she should eat an apple! (an apple a day keeps the doctor away!)
min2- (blank)

Raj- abey, i dont even know the name or number of the chick who i was with last nite!
Nor10- chill... I know! ;-)
Raj- (blank)

Raj- dude whats your delhi no.?
sick- 9999778888
Raj- are you kidding me!
sick- Cum on mayn, i paid 25 fucking grand for this number!
raj- What! (goes blank)

sick(comes running outa twist corridor)- dude mayn, my sister is pregnant!!
Raj-(runs backwards) hey! stop! i did not do anything! ;-)

Raj-dude you sent some awsome moves on the dancefloor yesterday night in enigma!
sick- oh yeah.. back home i used to go for hip hop dance classes...
Raj- there are hip hop dance classes! what do they teach? grinding, grabbing, spanking and makingout n stuff!
nor10- (blank) :-D

Raj- dude your delhi no. says "this number does not exist"!
sick- oh...(after 5 seconds) haha! you know where that no. is right now? Canada! i forgot it back home.. but my other no. is there... 9999556666!
Raj- (blank)
Nor10- (blank)

anko- how long does it take to go to the railway bridge?
Raj- umm.. around 5 kilometers..
anko- (blank)

Vinci- (first day) i wana eat this, i wana eat that...after eating pastries, vada, biryani.. "abe kuch aur khaate hai na"?
nor10 & anko- (blank)
Vinci- (2nd day) abe kuch khaate hai na..after eating- lets get some ice cream! abe kuch healthy khaate hai na?.. abey mere ko fruits chahiye.. lets go man..lets go buy fruits!
nor10 & anko- (blank) (wondering what has happened to him!)
Vinci- Abe raj,kuch khaate hai na..? lets go?
Raj- yeah lets go! come...
AFTER 2 HOURS!
Raj- eh vinci kuchh aur khaayega?
Vinci- abey nahi be..
raj- Fruits khaayega? ye le apple..
Vinci- nahi bey..please.. enough...
AT HOME
Raj- eh nor10, anko.. ask vinci if he wants to eat something?
Vinci-NO MAN..please.. i dont want to eat anything!
raj, anko, nor10- :-) hahahaha.. raj man what did u do to him?
Raj- Nothing i just made him eat ;-)

a random guy outside edge having a drunk conversation with vinci
random guy- oh you too from Canada! dats great.. where do u live? i stay in uptown...
Vinici- oh yeah bro i stay in downtown!
Raj & nor10-(blank) (when did vinci go to Canada?)

bala- hey..what did you do the whle day?
raj- i was procrastinating...
bala- (blank)
bala- what does "madhoshi" mean?
raj-procrastination..
bala-what is up with u and procrastination?
raj-nothing.. i just like the word..
bala- (blank)

raj- "fuck! dat chick has a nice butt dude! "
venky- dude we are having quite a 'crack'ed up conversation!
raj- (blank) (then cracks up) :-)

Bala- boss you are being mean..
raj- hey.. do u know the full form of BOSS?
bala- yeah.. umm..Bastard,,Of..Secret..

Society!! hahaa.....oops sorry..
Raj- (blank)


p.s.- one name(sick) has been changed to hide identity... ;-) :-D

TO BE CONTINUED.......... :-) :-) :-)................

The original partitioning software for windows of India- available at www.jinnahnehru.ego :-)

The jaswant singh controversy and reading a discussion on the partition of India on a friends note forces me to spill out some venom. (i think in a very weird way i have realized.. sigh..) :-P Some things I also know about the unfortunate event.

The superficial/diplomatic/vague/political reasons of the partition of India are known to the world but what actually/exactly was going on in the Indian, British and international politics, at that time is still hidden and would always be... the thirst of power gets inside everyone after a point and it keeps increasing. Bernard Shaw said "Power does not corrupt men; fools, however, if they get into a position of power, corrupt power". In this context I would like to replace fools with a bunch of few over ambitious people. And that would sum the entire thing up.

Ram commented somewhere that the inclusion of religion led to the partition. I don’t think it was a reason at all. It seems so but in reality it did not lead to the partition but it was portrayed that it was the basis of partition. Religion may be one of the aspects but it is not the cause. And religion has always been a part/basis of any politics, either directly or indirectly.

I can recall one of the conversations which my grand dad was having with my father (my grand dad was appointed as the permanent representative of Nepal to the United Nations and had studied/knew "a lot" about the world/Indian politics). From that discussion I came to know several things which are quite unknown to so many people. My father was saying that the partition of India was mostly a result of clash of ego of just a bunch of people who were sitting at the top (names are evident, don’t need to mention) and it was very strategically supervised and initiated by the British. But grand dad argued that the exact reason of partition appears to be very uncertain. He was talking about the partition of India being in the election manifesto of the then elected prime minister of Britain, Clement Attlee. How ironical is that! And Indians say they fought and won freedom! Partition of India (independence of Burma too was in the manifesto!) played a major role in the largest victory of labor party at polls in the general elections. And this was in 1945 (In February 1946 Attlee declared his intent (election manifesto) to liberate India and in Oct 1946 (if I remember correctly) he announced the grant of Independence to India)! And this was termed as the first and greatest act of decolonization in the British Empire!

What do we think about Pakistan celebrating Independence Day on August 14, while India celebrating it on August 15! (On a lighter note I would comment here that I am sure that the partition of India was decided and planned much before the independence was planned). It is so evident. :-) It is said that Two self governing countries legally came into existence on august 15th, 1947 and the ceremonies for the transfer of power were held a day earlier in Karachi, at the time the capital of the new state of Pakistan, so that Lord Mountbatten could attend both the ceremony in Karachi and in Delhi. It is even said that reason for Pakistan celebrating independence on August 14 is the adoption of new standard time in Pakistan after partition. Is not it funny? Isn’t it ironical and mocking? I read somewhere that this arrangement was to avoid the appearance that Pakistan was seceding from a sovereign India! I did not understand this. Sorry but I need elucidation!

My grand dad even said that one of his British counterpart ended up saying in some informal discussion that partition of India would not have happened if only some people knew that that Jinnah suffered from tuberculosis, which was apparently incurable at that time! he would have been handed over the power. strange but true... that British official even quoted Lord Mountbatten, that when he learned of Jinnah's ailment, he said 'had they known that Jinnah was about to die, they'd have postponed India's independence by a few months as he was being inflexible on Pakistan'.

I have much to talk on this issue which I would do, soon. I have to go for now. :-(

Do i disgust you?

On public demand here I come again with my new stock of world's (second) most disgusting jokes to disgust you my friends and avid readers… I hope you like them, appreciate them and in return boost my morale so that I can constantly render you my services, free of cost!

So here we go…

Q. what would Mintu’s brothers name be if he had a double chin?
A. Chin-two.

Q. If Norten had a brother, his name would have been?
A. Nortwenty!

Q. If Norten had two brothers, their name would have been?
A. Nortwenty and Northirty. (& so on…)

Q. If Norten dint have a brother then his name would have been?
A. Neither-ten!

Q. If Venkat cut wood, what would we call it?
A. Venkcut!

Q. If a serial director hit a plug point socket and got a shock while making love to his girlfriend, what would he call it?
A. Sex and the Electricity!

Q. If Boy zone launched a new brand of dildos, what would they name it?
A. Toy zone!

Q. what is the name of the new movie Shahrukh Khan and Farah Khan are going to make on the life of Madonna?
A. Mad-hoo-na!

The legendary singer Shaan, being worried about his decreasing popularity has approached Shahrukh Khan and Farah Khan. They are going to make a movie for him named “My name is Shaan”!

My friend told me with great excitement and confidence that “dude with these chicks you should always apply this formula of ‘fuck and fly’!
Another friend objected and said “no, I think you should adopt fuck until she flies”!
I got up with despair saying “fuck the flies”!

i hope i was able to disgust you people.. i shall come back soon.. :-)

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

few lines i came across and i am loving them...

For everything there is a season,
And a time for every matter under heaven:

A time to be born, and a time to die;
A time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;

A time to kill, and a time to heal;
A time to break down, and a time to build up;

A time to weep, and a time to laugh;
A time to mourn, and a time to dance;

A time to throw away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
A time to embrace, And a time to refrain from embracing;

A time to seek, and a time to lose;
A time to keep, and a time to throw away;

A time to tear, and a time to sew;
A time to keep silence, and a time to speak;

A time to love, and a time to hate,
A time for war, and a time for peace.....